Hilarious paradox...at least for me.

Aloha!

As many of you know, I have a chronic disorder- unnamed yet, but from what I have found, quite
 prevalent. I just can't resist a good book. :)
Anyways I came across a rather curious piece of text and would like all of you to read it:

"By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm
etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept
this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive
a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by
sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person
you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical
medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request."


Just made me wonder about the paradox of informing a person that by reading this text, he/she agrees to and accepts something. C'mon people, what if the person does'nt agree?

MY LOVE, MY LIFE


There was a time
I worked in a gold mine,
toiling hard through the day
sleping harder at night
earning my daily bread
and a bottle of wine.

Then one day
stumbled upon a diamond did I
held it against
my puny lamp's eye
and gaped awestruck,
at the bedazzling light.

No sleep that night
as I pondered upon
what was writ for me
on the sands of time.

Worthless for sure, I assumed.
No golden sparkle could I find.
Precious nevertheless,
held me mesmerised.
I treasured it the most
kept it near my heart.
Lose it I would not
it was mine, it was mine...

Life went on
as it had in the past
albeit with a difference.
Merry was my soul
tranquil my mind
Heart brimming with
a warmth deep inside.

Started appreciatin'
ye mother nature,
her fresh smells and merry sounds
wafting through the shaft
to my working ground.

I saw the yellow sun,
purple haze and the blue sky
Heard the melodious sparrow
singing merrily on a
beautiful birch aisle.
I smelled the soil,
the greens and the mire,
all by lusting upon
this work of art, my pride.

Alas! Vile villainies
of the finger of fate,
split my breast and ripped my heart
tore me from limb to limb
and took me apart.
It wrested my beauty, my love,
snatched it,
and left me helpless.

Hapless and naked
dragged on did I,
hoping to be reunited,
trusting my chaste love
for the only thing of beauty
ever known have I.

Survived those wretched times
not alone did I.
Had the luscious company
of the days gone by,
of the time when I
had my love and my life
by my side.

It has kept me warm an' bright
and am smiling all the time
feeling that beautiful art of nature
trasured in my heart, in my mind.

When I dream at night
I see the love of my life,
drink its warmth
and lust in its light.
My hands reach out
and caress it right,
the thing of beauty
my personal delight!

And if the face of fate
should indeed upon me smile,
all I want, all I wish
is for my love to be mine.
To hold it in my arms,
to bathe in its light,
and to hold on to it again
with all my might.


Phew! Finally wrote a poem years after my previous one. Hope its upto the standard. It really is a special one and would really like some comments.


See you later.

Wear it, Wear these !

Hey ppl,
Since the World AIDS Day just past, I thought that as a law-abiding citizen of the world, I should do my bit of spreadin' awareness. 

Well getting straight to the point, AIDS or Acquired Immuno..blah blah blah....c'mon, you all know this shit...so here's somethin different:

Probably the best way of avoiding AIDS is protection and that means "USE CONDOMS". Now it is definitely no good if packets gather the sands of time in medical stores while youngsters have unprotected sex just because they are too shy to go and ask for a damn condom. So as an awareness program, people are encouraged to look at this latex piece as a commodity without feeling awkward. Here I provide snaps of a couple of beautiful dresses making the above point.





I think you might have guessed/deduced. If not, both dresses are made entirely of condoms!

Chao.

ON DETERMINATION AND SEX

Confounded about the topic? Let me help blow the fog of confusion out of your troubled minds. Determination is not a forte I am usually tagged with. I used to think otherwise until recently when, on the basis of what I have heard, my li'll bro showed me what 'real' determination looked like. However, I did undertake some commitments in my life and am, so to say, determined to see them through. This post is regarding one very important, albeit shunned one-SEX. Now if you have really read this post and are still continuing, I take that either you don't belong to the other extreme of the spectrum which considers sex talks to be harrowing, to say the least, or you are
too inquisitive about me or the topic to let go. Either way, lemme begin.

During school, I considered myself to be good in studies and co-curricular activities. I used to be frequent at debates,quizzes and stuff. That came as a result of another 'determined commitment' but lets leave that story for some other time. OK. So everything was fine until one fine morning I was contacted by our English teacher for a debate being organised in a nearby town by an NGO. It was only after accepting (not that I had a choice) did I get the snatch. The debate was on a very short notice. Of course you might have deduced from the post topic, the topic on debate was "Sex Education". That didn't matter though, as I was too naive to comprehend or worry about it. In fact, initially I had it confused with co-education. Anyways I took it all in a stride and delved into note-making and discussion sessions with our teacher. So on D-Day I was ready for some oral action. I had my butterflies though but they usually accompany me to all oratory competitions. However this one was different. The event was a school success and a personal fiasco rolled into one. I was the only one from my school not only to return empty handed, but also the only one who spoke absolutely nothing. Somehow I just froze up and instead of speaking, all I ever did was stare. That was the moment actually when I decided that I will never ever shun away from sex-talks.

Now to make it clear, one must accept that the world is changing towards being a more free and liberal place. Of course there are varied scattered nodes of conservatism but on a whole, one simply cannot stick his/her head inside sand, with eyes closed shut and pretend that we are naught but docile puppets in thy Lord's hands. Though there never was a time when youngsters were happily oblivious to the existance of genitalia of the opposite sex, they simply pretended innocence lest they should commit some violation and be held responsible in 'Lord's court of justice'. While acts powered by hormonal urges have metamorphed in myriad ways, now is the time when they are no longer considered sins. Every human has needs and it is the vileness of suppressing these bodily desires which leads to invasion of individuals. I have no doubt that human nature is such that the best way to disarm such robbers is to freely allow them to indulge. Don't get me wrong. I am no supporter of rapists. In fact, I ardently stand against them. My point is that it is human tendency to crave for what you want and this craving is heightened when the act itself is forbidden. Of course I realise that for such a utopian society to exist, a prerequisite would be empowerment and that brings us to the topic of discussion.

Sex is something which, one way or another, each of us is eventually supposed to have. It is not only the ultimate expression of love but also the sole primary objective of each life in the bigger picture. What has actually changed over the centuries is the age group of people who lose their virginity. Granted that the earlier system of passing such knowledge worked but in view of evolution, it has to be changed. The ultimate goal of sex education is that individuals should be aware of all its aspects before they indulge. As now younger youngsters are gaining coital pleasures, it is imperative that sex education be popularised in lower age groups. It should be freely discussed on moral, psychological, physical and medial grounds so that people should know beforehand what they are getting into. It is believed that such openness would make people realise the implications of their act and they will feel more responsible. Needless to say, this will also answer some questions pertaining to world population and health. Another strong point is that in today's world one simply cannot control the access youngsters get and information from a reliable source is much better than either its absence or one from croocked cronies.

I think volumes remain to be said on the topic and I will in all centainity do so. However lets stop for now with some food for thought:

“I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath.' For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds.” -Joan Rivers


Encore une fois !

Hello there.

Recently I had the chance to see one of the most vivacious and ravishing acts of character portrayal I think I have ever seen.  Allow me to say that I was flabbergasted at the least. The particular character in question was personified on 
screen by none other than Hugo Weaving and immediately 
made me want to put up a post here. Unfortunately, my studies interfered and I had to put off the idea for quite some time. Now it would be grave injustice if I go on any further without thanking the great work done by wikipedia and its associate services from where Iderive the following chunk of 'a masterpiece'. So without any further ado, I present some 
beautiful quotes from the movie "V for Vendetta" :

As usual, first the appetisers:

"Artists use lies to tell the truth while politicians use them to cover the truth up."

"Beneath this mask there is more than flesh. Beneath this mask there is an idea, Mr. Creedy, and ideas are bulletproof."

"I'd only told them the truth. Was that so selfish? Our integrity sells for so little, but it is all we really have. It is the very last inch of us, but within that inch, we are free."


Make way for the main courses:

"We are told to remember the idea, not the man. Because a man can fail. He can be killed and forgotten. But four hundred years later an idea can still change the world. I've witnessed firsthand the power of ideas. I've seen people kill in the name of them; and die defending them. But you cannot touch an idea, cannot hold it or kiss it. An idea does not bleed, it cannot feel pain, and it does not love. And it is not an idea that I miss, it is a man. A man who made me remember the fifth of November. A man I will never forget."

"It seems strange that my life should end in such a terrible place, but for three years I had roses and apologized to no one. I shall die here. Every inch of me shall perish. Every inch, but one. An inch. It is small and it is fragile and it is the only thing in the world worth having. We must never lose it or give it away. We must NEVER let them take it from us. I hope that whoever you are, you escape this place. I hope that the worlds turns, and that things get better. But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you."

"Evey: Who are you?
V      : Who? Who is but the form following the function of "what", and what I am is a man in a mask.
Evey: Well I can see that.
V      : Of course you can. I'm not questioning your powers of observation, I'm merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man who he is.
Evey: Oh...right.
V      : But on this most auspicious of nights, permit me then, in lieu of the more commonplace sobriquet, to suggest the character of this dramatis personæ."


And now for, if I may say so, the crescendo. 'Tis my favourite and I really don't need to ask you to notice the number of words starting with the letter 'V':

"VoilĂ ! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V."

I say a translation is in the calling, what say you?

Behold! Before you is a humble stage performer, cast, against his will, by the whims of fate, to the roles of both victim and villain. The face you see now is not just some meaningless costume. It is a remnant of the People's Voice, which has since gone and disappeared. However, this past annoyance stands courageously reborn and has sworn to conquer the evil and corrupt, who promote greed and the violent suppression of free will. The only choice is vengeance; a personal war held as a promise, but not in vain, for the importance and self-evidence of this quest shall one day exonerate the watchful and the righteous. But in truth, this thick soup of words has become too excessive. So, let me simply finish by saying that it's my very good honor to meet you, and you may call me V.

Monsieur, please don't leave without the desserts:

"The multiplying villainies of nature do swarm upon him...Disdaining fortune with his brandished steel/which smoked with bloody execution..."-(Macbeth 1.2.17-18)

"We are oft to blame in this. 'Tis too much proved that with devotion's visage and pious action we do sugar o'er the devil himself."-(Hamlet 3.1.46-49)

"And thus I clothe my naked villainy; with old odd ends, stol'n forth of holy writ; And seem a saint, when most I play the devil"-(Richard III (play) 1.3.336-38)

"Conceal me what I am, and be my aid; For such disguise as haply shall become; The form of my intent."-(Twelfth Night)




Bon appetit!

MY ENCOUNTERS WITH MODERN VAMPIRES

In the recent past I have had numerous contacts with individuals of this blood-sucking species. In fact, most of you must also have had some contacts too, although you may or may not have realised it. I didn't know they were so ferocious while I was under the protection of hostel premises. However, since I moved out this year I've began to appreciate their various qualities. To have a deeper understanding of our encounters, let me recap a bit for ya:


"Initially, I tried to go after each and every one of them but soon realised the fruitlessness of my hunt. They were extremely manipulative, were quite fast, had strength in numbers and owing to no dearth of hiding places, could pop outta nowhere. Simply put, they were way above my league. I thought about various possible alternatives but few really seemed to work against them. It would do good to remimnd the readers that these are not those creatures goryfied on screen. They were different. Garlics do them no harm, crucifixes are mockable to them and stake, well lets just say their bodies render that method of purging useless.

So now, I just redirect them away to a more unsuspecting victim. But before getting all judgemental you should know that I actually did get a few of them. However the spoils were not upto the work I had to do. In these few cases I had to watch them wither with agony, shiver with pain and see their various attempts to get up and going before they finally let go. I assure the readers it would not make fine table conversation. Apart from the psychological trauma, if their bodies get compromised, they leave behind their mark on the place of their death. Dark blood comes out and mars the aesthetic beauty forever. The blood progressively gets darker and darker until you no longer can recognise it unless you know where it came from. It eats one inside out. And to think of it, its your own blood you are looking at. Blood that used to run in your own veins, blood that was cruelly sucked out of your body against your will and made to what it is now.

Gory as these things seem to be, there really is a brighter side to these mongrels of blood. When bitten by one of them, technically you do not become one of them. Also if a person wants to, with a bent of mind as required and the help of a few weapons of choice can eradicate the earth from these creatures. However I believe such an act to be Godless as no matter what they are, these vile creatures do serve a purpose. And I think to wage war against them just for their, so to say, diability to refrain from lusting on blood would be inhumane."


Dear reader, now that you have wasted a couple of minutes reading the piece of crap I wrote above, think about it...no, re-read it. But this time, you would do well to keep in mind that all I have talked about is "mosquitoes".



Cya!

 

Charlie and the space factory!

Near future
Charlie gets up in the morning feeling the rhythm of his 'vibra-alarm matress'. He drags himself to the 'disinfection room' and empties his bowels down the 'incinerator shaft' while his body is being disinfected. He then walks to the 'incoming chute' to find his ration of coffee insta-mix waiting. He pics up the cup and feeling his pulse the cup brews the coffee to the required level. He tears off the wrapping and sips on the freshly brewed coffee while walking down the 'apparel chamber'. Depending upon the feedback from the 'mood sensors' the wardrobe computer sprays on his work dress which forms a silk-like veil upon touching his body cells, giving a cloth-like experience. Finally ready to work, he is zoomed to his desk at the 'Pluto Colony A529'.

Nearer future
Charlie's digital alarm clock wakes him up. He crawls to the cleaning room, does his business and takes a cold-steam shower. Coming back, he sips at the mug of coffee prepared by the cooking staff while chosing what to wear to work today. He dresses up and leaves his 'living chamber'. Sliding upon the rolling 'walk-ramp' he reaches 'Exit station 102' just in time to catch the shuttle leaving for 'Asia-Pacific space station 2'. A relatively small journey of a few minutes takes him to his workplace where he achieves full functionality in about 4 minutes.

Nearest future
Charlie's hand shoots out to muffle his old crooner clock. Yawning, he walks down to the bathroom, brushes, uses the loo and takes a shower. Stepping out he makes himself a cuppa coffee and rushes to his wardrobe. Putting on a standard work suit, he leaves the apartment. He takes the freeway to his office, parks his car and walks to his desk where his secretary informs him that he has a visitor. His 'visitor' announces that his application to board the flagship shuttle 'Carmina' has been accepted and next week he is supposed to be visiting a team of Iraqi biologists working on the farms of Mars.


Not surprisingly, this is where "space tourism" is gonna take us!

The beginning of it all.

Okay,
I have to confess.

Chill ppl, nothin serious...

I wud like to inform you that the starting of it all....'the beginning' of this, well, very rarely read blog ws a thought, a vision, an inspiration.
One fine day I was going thru a mail from "warrior of the light  online" (mail list of Paolo Coelho)
It was something about what wud happen if a person choses immortality by chosing to become  a vampire. Well very nice idea Mr. Dracula except one tiny-winy problem. The person choses to be immortal bcause he ' loved the world he lived in'. Eventually he finds the world changes and he's stuck up in da past. This situation goes on upto a time when finally he hates the new world and decides to commit suicide. (HEY CHECK IT OUT...."THE SUICIDAL VAMPIRE")...lol

Well folks, he starts going around in sun, stares at crucifixes, roams around in church, smells a lotta garlic........BANG! ......find that all these stupid things are jus a part of literature n cant do nethin to him...................This very thought was so  so hilarious....(still smile thinkin bout it).
Well, that ws da startin of this blog.

Recently got another mail frm Paolo n decided to share a small excerpt with you all. I really liked these few lines, so here goes:

“Don’t try to be coherent all the time; discover the joy of being a surprise to yourself. Being coherent is having always to wear a tie that matches your socks. It means being obliged to keep tomorrow the same opinions you have today. What about the world, which is always in movement? As long as it doesn’t harm anyone, change your opinion now and again, and contradict yourself without feeling ashamed - you have a right to that! It doesn’t matter what the others may think – because they are going to think that way no matter what.”




Adios!!

Oh! C'mon Ms. Coulter.

Well this month I had spent a lotta time at home n owing to the limitless broadband ther, went thru a lotta "YouTube" stuff. While rummagin thru da truckloads(if i may say so), I happened to chance upon a certain Coultergeist clip. What followed was a week long hunt for this 'lady'. In retrospect, here's what I have to say:

Nobody asked me but if sum1 did, I would have found it really hard to explain xactly why I ws listenin to her stuff. All I can say that shock n disbelief surely played a major role in it. I used to believe that the only chance to get such views ws to go thru texts of long begone times, times when......aaa....aa...really cant parallel it with anything other than burning women for fear of witchcraft. The first time i heard her speak i ws downright shocked. I mean i'd heard of conservationists but this really pushed the limits of my comprehension of their ideas. Well where do I start? I think I'll quote jus a few ones which I feel r relevant and you my dear reader can judge my views as you please. Jus dont 4get to drop in a comment or two.

For starters, take a peep at a couple of, well, nt so ugly ones:

"There are a lot of bad republicans; there are no good democrats."

"We need to execute people like (John Walker Lindh) in order to physically intimidate liberals."

Some more anti-liberal banter:

"Whether they are defending the Soviet Union or bleating for Saddam Hussein, liberals are always against America. They are either traitors or idiots."

"Liberals are stalwart defenders of civil liberties -- provided we're only talking about criminals."

Chk this out, probably one of my favs:

"We should invade their countries, kill their leaders, and convert them to Christianity."

As far as I remember frm a clip, she went on to say that America should carpet bomb these countries so that none survive....r sumthin soundin even more bullshit than this!

Here, found the complete excerpt:

"We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity. We weren't punctilious about locating and punishing only Hitler and his top officers. We carpet-bombed German cities; we killed civilians. That's war. And this is war."


However the following one caused all media frenzy in da clips i saw(dunno da dates of 'em). In her latest book "Godless", she had this to say about those widows of 9/11 victims who were critical of the Bush Admin. and r known as Jersey girls:

"These broads are millionaires, lionized on TV and in articles about them, reveling in their status as celebrities and stalked by griefparrazies. I have never seen people enjoying their husband's deaths so much."






Jus one question.

"CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?"


Indian a-la-carte'

Nah!
Though being a self-confessed food-lover, this write-up has nothing to do with the palate.
Actually a few dust-gathering chords in my otherwise latent brain were struck a week ago when I (accidentally) witnessed a procession. Well, getting to the point, the parade, if I may say, was supposed to be one protesting against "Female Foeticide". A noble cause without doubt. However the pin in my back pricked when I found that one could get the above conclusion from one and only one place- the so-called leading banner carried at the head of the rally. I was kinda, well not surprised really, but saddened when I didn't get anything against the social evil in audio or visual form from the rallyists. All one could get outta them were chants about the greatness of a leading political party of the country and its leaders. In fact, the party banner almost covered up the aforementioned banner.
Now I had heard earlier about country goin to rags n stuff, about masses getting into processions and all jus to get a square meal promised at its end. Having such a first-hand experience as I had that day, I really don't believe these ideas to be too fantastic. Makes me really think where the hell this country's headin to. Well as they say, in India, everything jus exists...better not ask the how question, cause nobody can really answer you!

TO MEOW OR NOT TO MEOW?

Past couple of weeks I have been tormented by the thoughts about the decisions i know I must make, decisions that will decide my future quite bindingly, decisions I know i'll have to make sooner or later. Those of you who are still virginal in this aspect, though I doubt there may be any, and those who believe any one of the above options to be better, I assure you all that when it comes down to it, none's the easier or fairer of the two. Alas! Sometimes it seems unfair or downright cruel for such decisions to be forced upon us. Our only consolation remains in the fact that it is ourselves we affect and ourselves we stand for.

For the benefit of those who are feeling nausiated, dizzy or simply lost, let me provide a bit of a background. I'm a student and a fairly good one in that. I do have my darker side but then who does'nt. Now the scenario is that I'm a third(last but one) year college student who, as I have mentioned earlier, is quite in a dilemma. Well to ensure better placement in the recruitment drive, our college organises a Pre-Placement Training (PPT) programme. Sounds nice, does'nt it? But lets have a brush-up with the reality. This PPT programme basically throws 70 odd students in a room under a faculty for a duration of two hours after a gruelling college of 6 hours. Surely gossips start flying high and low in the classroom. Now its not as bad as it sounds. You see, the college had conducted a diagnostic test to sort us all as per our supposed proficiency or the lack of it. Even though the evaluation method is seriously doubted by students, I happened to be placed in Group 1, not disclosed to be the best or worst by the college, and so no assumptions made. Fortunately though, the conduct in the class is quite good and I have no complaints in that department. What really bothers me is the fact that we are supposed to pay Rs.6,500 for the programme even though we already pay Rs.3,000 per annum towards placement!

Well, back to me then. For me the gameplan was quite well chalked out by my parents. My priority is to be aiming for a good B-school with the back-up plan of a job offer in my pocket! Smooth is'nt it? Quite confidently, I had informed our Head of Department that I would not be participating in the PPT. I had decided, not without thought, that I would put all the resources I have at my disposal towards achieving the dream my parents have made me dream. It took me days of mental preparation to collect all my enthusiasm and chalk out a decent plan of study for the same. After all, I felt quite confident that I could bell the CAT! Well in this case quite literally as the Common Admission Test or the CAT is the exam to get into the premium B-schools in India. For the past week I had ran in and out of CAT coaching centres more than there were days to do so. I had even decided to shell out a sum of about Rs.14,000 towards the end. After all, its CAT I am talking about and I didn't want to leave any stone unturned.

However, as in any good story, there indeed was a catch! It seems good sense to the college authorities to allow only those students for the recruitment drive who pay for the PPT. Needless to say, the news was a jaw-shattering one. So after all the days of running and deciding and thinking and spending, I was essentially at the same point where I was when I started. Remember in novels, when things happen too fast, characters start counting numbers-evens, odds, primes, squares, anything for that matter. If nothing else then just to feel that they do have a grip on something in their lives. You can say now I know why they do so. Anyways it seems I have just three options before me. Well actually have a lot of them but lets just stick to reality here.

One being to go ahead as planned, get into a B-school, and if it comes to the worst, try to make the best out of off-campus recruitment drives. A very bold plan any Gryffindor would be proud of. No complications involved, total focus on the target
and very little chance of failure. The downside being I really don't know how long this bubble of enthusiasm, confidence and motivation will last. Knowing me, I would say nearly a month and that's all, but who knows, maybe CAT preps may be different.
This strategy also has a value added benefit that I would'nt have to spend sleepless nights and restless days, which is what happens usually when the recruitment time comes. The second being to forget it all, go through PPT, and try to scratch a respectable score with test series and crash courses. Nice plan with the least botheration involved. In fact, I get literally everything at my doorsteps. But really don't know how far these PPT classes are going to take me towards a good CAT score. The third and the most unlikely choice being to juggle my time between this end and that. Now I know most people, both seniors and peers, are opting for this option but this really is the last resort for me. For one, I'll be busy like a bull from dawn to dusk and even after. For another, even if I take the pressure, I'll be too tired to do anything but sleep. And personal experiences suggest, nay, shout out loud that under these circumstances I'll have my feet on two different boats and my stamina will fade away really fast. Now that's a situation I totally want to avoid!


UPDATE:  Alas! As happens most frequetly with mere humans, 'cruel world' and its circumstances forced me to take the option I dreaded the most.

Comments wanted and welcome!